Car horoscope for the week of May 7-13

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  1. Auto horoscope from 7 to 13 May
    • Aries
    • Taurus
    • Twins
    • Cancer
    • a lion
    • Virgo
    • scales
    • Scorpion
    • Sagittarius
    • Capricorn
    • Aquarius
    • Fishes


Most drivers can look ahead with confidence, and not worry about anything - this week in May will be fun and glorious, the stars will not talk in vain. In general, we drive, and let our paths become smooth, and the angry traffic cops turn into good-natured ones. And let's not forget to decorate the cars, celebrate the Great Victory Day and congratulate our veterans. At pedestrian crossings, it is advisable to be attentive - the people are now scattered and relaxed, after all, the spring sun warms in an adult way, and people are rushing at full steam, some to the dachas, some to the villages, and some on a well-deserved vacation to the warm sea and gentle sand ( here are the lucky ones).

Auto horoscope from 7 to 13 May

Aries

Aries, guess the riddle - bold and sleek on the outside, kind and fluffy on the inside. Well, it's clear, it's clear that we are talking about your favorite car. There is real grace in the salon, I don't even want to go out. And you don't go out, but drive all day long - you can even get a job in a taxi or earn some money as a pizza delivery guy. If you come across traffic cops citing Onegin and muttering about the uncle of the most honest rules, do not panic - the patrol guys did not mix anything up, and one of the May days they really celebrate Pushkin's birthday. Only not Alexander Sergeevich, but Vasily Lvovich, who was the poet's uncle. You have a well-read typewriter, and will not arrange a duel on this matter.

Taurus

Taurus, the stars respect the drivers of your sign for their accuracy and politeness - well done, take a pie in the trunk, or whatever they put you there on the road. But don't let strangers or aunts steer - the iron horse hates when strangers touch it. If your inquisitive four-wheeled girlfriend starts sniffing and looking at the nearby Opel, do not rush to leave the parking lot - after all, this week in May everyone is celebrating the birthday of German businessman Adam Opel. Maybe, for the sake of such a wonderful holiday, they will organize a discount on gasoline - drive more to the nearest gas station for fuel, suddenly you are really lucky.

Twins

Gemini, if you do not have enough vivid impressions, go on a trip - these May days the roads are full of all kinds of colors, but most often green. The stars speak not only about the traffic signal, but also about the colors of the cars - salad is now in vogue, and the khaki color is also not far behind. You don't have to take food with you - in roadside cafes this spring there is food for every stomach and wallet. It turns out that the United States has come up with a holiday in which you can eat whatever you want. If only the iron horses did not go crazy and did not demand milk instead of gasoline or protein cream instead of machine oil, you will have to cheat a little and tie the headlights on the car at the gas station.

Cancer

Crayfish, the wind is fair these May days, so don't look for excuses, load the things you need to rest in the trunk and drive out of town. And warn passengers about possible traffic jams, otherwise they will whine and demand that you call a helicopter for them. By the way, about traffic jams - this time you will be lucky, and all your road acquaintances will be interesting and useful. That uncle in Zhiguli is a gas station worker, and that aunt in a blue Lada works in the field of education. But do not forget to take the noodles off your ears when you listen to the stories of the traffic cops - the patrol guys celebrate Munchausen's birthday and lie a little (by the way, the baron was an honest man, he just liked to embellish the reality).

A lion

Lions, the Ministry of Emergency Situations frightens with a squally wind, forecasters threaten with showers, and only traffic cops smile and cheerfully wave their wands. Do not flatter yourself, perhaps road policemen are brushing off bees or mosquitoes. In these days in May, the stars asked themselves: what is the difference between the sidewalk and the roadway? Apparently, you will not find the differences, because some drivers strive to settle down right on the zebra crossing, on the footpath or at the bus stop. But you are the right car enthusiasts and do not create problem situations - take the prize, it is located behind the nearest intersection. Yes, yes, where there are old women with three-liter cans - grandmothers celebrate the holiday of Birch trees and sell healthy delicacies.

Virgo

Virgo, this spring week you will become the kings of the roads and princes of the tracks (well, either princesses or princesses, the stars are not interested in sex, it is important for them to have rights). But it is not necessary to cling to the gold crown on the car - it is both inconvenient and can be stolen, because on these days of May the hijackers suddenly became active. If you notice Filia and Stepashka among the pedestrians, do not honk, and do not frighten the kids - the guys specially put on the costumes of the heroes from Good Night. Everyone celebrates the birthday of the wonderful TV presenter Vladimir Ukhin, and even the typewriter recalls Uncle Volodya from the children's program with delight. But do not fall asleep, otherwise a traffic cop in Piggy's suit will come running and ruin the whole idyll.

Scales

Libra, do not arrange competitions and do not prove to others that you are the coolest - this is already evident, even the car is shining, as if it has already taken first place and a famous racer is sitting behind the wheel. The stars advise you to be careful, because incomprehensible and mysterious creatures wander along the tracks and zebras. Either citizens with different eyes, or even witches with mops under their arms. On these days in May, everyone celebrates Vladimir Bortko's birthday, and the characters of the film "The Master and Margarita" went out for a walk. The main thing is that the conductors on the trams are warned - black cats do not ride every day, and you need to have respect for them. If anything, give a couple of cats a ride to the nearest traffic police post - the traffic cops have already driven them for milk.

Scorpion

Scorpions, you set records, overtook all the cars and even outwitted the traffic cops - say thank you to your swallow, it flies no worse than an airplane. But it is advisable to slow down near the garage - it is not at all necessary to douse the neighbors with dust, they will still be offended and they will stop coming to the gatherings, you will have to talk to the car, and you know, she is not very talkative. When you meet guys in camouflage uniforms, do not drive by - they celebrate the day of the guard. Do not be afraid, there is nothing to arrest you for, but tidy up in the glove compartment, and it is better to throw out the crumbs from the cookies - you never know what. And the wheelbarrow after cleaning will grow kinder and finally arrange a country trip for you.

Sagittarius

Sagittarius, have you seen the movie Taxi? If yes, then you know that it is impossible to make this movie with us - where the hero could accelerate so much, except on federal highways, and even then it is doubtful. There is no need to philosophize on these days in May, better jump into the car - the traffic lights shine green, and even wink: they say, we know everything, and we understand everything. Don't worry, you didn't get into the show and you don't need to smile for the camera. And don't be surprised if you meet people with posters showing crossed mosquitoes - the people are celebrating the birthday of Ronald Ross, who received the Nobel Prize for his research in the field of malaria (the iron horse is afraid of mosquitoes and will happily join the procession).

Capricorn

Capricorns, stars noticed that in the spring they often turn to airbrushing workshops. Someone orders a portrait of their beloved on the hood, someone urgently needs to depict a still life, in general, who is in that much. But you control yourself and do not ask to be painted the face of a familiar traffic cop on the trunk.And wash the typewriter, because non-professional artists walk the streets and wiggle their fingers right on the dusty glass (stellar censorship does not allow repeating these three-letter combinations). And on weekends, generally cover the car with a cover - on Saturday is the day of migratory birds, and the winged ones can not restrain themselves and do things right on the shining surface of the car.

Aquarius

Aquarians, sing a road lullaby to your car and leave it in the garage - even tireless iron horses need rest. And jump on the tram or the bus yourself - the authorities keep order in public transport, perhaps they won't even step on your feet. And if they hustle over new bots, it doesn't matter - a free massage and a reason to start a conversation. And be careful this May Saturday, especially at noon - people lined up on the zebras and turned their faces to the warm wind. No mysticism - the people celebrate the day of nine healers, and read the conspiracy from adversity. So that's why the traffic cops stand with such blissful smiles and don't even react to the drivers showing their tongues.

Fishes

Fish, turn the car towards the forest in front, back to the traffic cops, and drive faster - on these spring days the path lies outside the city, and standing at the traffic police posts is completely pointless (the guardians of order will not say anything new, they will only spoil the mood and ask for money for life). If you are a compassionate driver, you can give the patrol guys a tea bag, as Thomas Lipton's birthday is celebrated this week in May. Think of the tea mogul and drink an invigorating drink at a roadside cafe - maybe you will be lucky, and this time you will be poured not only boiling water, but also sugar and tea leaves. And the iron horse will gladly feast on fresh grass at the gas station (sorry, gasoline).

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